Women only staff, junk food and copious amounts of booze. Is this the best environment for a drunkard?
The Big Red, 385 Holloway Road, Islington, London
Blacked out walls and candlelight might make this the darkest bar I’ve ever been in. Not good considering most of their regular customers end up blending into the walls with their gothic attire. Which makes any unsuspecting tourist who stumbles across the bar for a quick pint, stand out like an erection in a morph suit.
The bar staff seem miserable but who could blame them? I’d be depressed if I had to work with women all night. Plus, they have to serve people with a picture of themselves, half naked on display next to them in the form of a calendar for anyone to buy.
Big Red does promise to get you wired and boy do they deliver. Quick service and various shots is enough to get anyone excited. But I found myself getting drunk too quickly, so I grabbed the menu and fell into drunk food heaven. Brisket Burgers, jumbo hot dogs and mac and cheese balls were perfect for soaking up a stomach full of tequila. The balls were sensational and fitted perfectly in my mouth. I did wonder though how they managed to get this soggy pasta dish into a breadcrumb scrotum… hmm.
The place is more than just a bar, it’s an event. Whether its scantily clad ladies breathing fire, rock and roll fairs or a local rock band, there’s always something exciting to make you glad you’ve made the journey. You’re free to run riot around pool tables and dance in a leather booth. Just don’t smash any glasses, they don’t like that.